SPORTS WINGER

REALKILLER
"I tell them they are very beautiful in Portuguese and I sometimes put the accent on as well," `he` says. So they have a, well, liaison and in the morning, "I just say to them, `I`ve got something to tell you`." What? Well, he isn`t Ronaldo; he`s Jaime Wright from Eastbourne. Despite looking more like Gary Neville, Jamie earns £800 a day, his work so far "yielding" five women who thought Cristiano and themselves had become an item. "Luckily they always find it funny," said Jamie, who, if he had a heart, would lend them a few quid to buy contact lenses.